Family...
My sister-in-law died last week. It was tragic on so many levels. She was just diagnosed in February with stage 4 stomach cancer. Rather than spend the last few weeks of her life sick from chemo that would not help, she decided to make peace with it all. She left behind a husband of almost 20 years, 4 adult children, at least 8 grand children and 2 great-grand children as well as family and friends who will miss her.
Though she should have been diagnosed much earlier, they decided not to pursue any legal action against her treating physicians - no use following this tragedy with a drawn-out legal battle - that wasn't Syble's style.
Going down to Southeastern Oklahoma is like stepping though a door into another world. Just three hours southeast and the culture is completely different - not better or worse, just different. And, going there stirs up so many memories and emotions.
The cemetary is so different from those in cities. A little country graveyard in a meadow by a pond. Before the county cut a gravel road to it, we had to go through a farmer's yard to get to it. It is beautiful and tragic at the same time. And there, in the ground, lie the bones of so much of my family - each with their own sad story. My dad, my aunt Mary, my grandpa (Papa), my grandmother, my uncle Dood, and two of my brother's children. Yes, this is the same brother who just buried his wife.
There is a Waltons' episode called "The Pony Cart". The woman who played the guest lead won an Emmy for her performance. In it, she plays an elderly Walton family member who is being forced from her home. In one scene, she visits the graveyard where many of her family members are buried. As she pulls away the weeds and brushes away the leaves, she says (paraphrased) an unattended, unkept grave is a family disgrace. In the city cemetaries, people are paid to mow and sweep - perpetual care is one phrase used. But, in the country graveyards, it is the responsibility of those still alive.
My sister told me the week before Memorial Day used to be a big deal in these small towns. The communities would band together and go the the country cemetaries to clean them up in preparation for the familes coming on Memorial Day but, that tradition has fallen by the wayside. As I stood there, in the company of my brothers, my sister, my son, nieces, nephews, and other family members, as well as my brother's first wife (the mother of his children), I remembered how important family is and how important heritage is.
Take time to reconnect with those members of your family from whom you've drifted away. Family reunions should not only take place at funerals.
Though she should have been diagnosed much earlier, they decided not to pursue any legal action against her treating physicians - no use following this tragedy with a drawn-out legal battle - that wasn't Syble's style.
Going down to Southeastern Oklahoma is like stepping though a door into another world. Just three hours southeast and the culture is completely different - not better or worse, just different. And, going there stirs up so many memories and emotions.
The cemetary is so different from those in cities. A little country graveyard in a meadow by a pond. Before the county cut a gravel road to it, we had to go through a farmer's yard to get to it. It is beautiful and tragic at the same time. And there, in the ground, lie the bones of so much of my family - each with their own sad story. My dad, my aunt Mary, my grandpa (Papa), my grandmother, my uncle Dood, and two of my brother's children. Yes, this is the same brother who just buried his wife.
There is a Waltons' episode called "The Pony Cart". The woman who played the guest lead won an Emmy for her performance. In it, she plays an elderly Walton family member who is being forced from her home. In one scene, she visits the graveyard where many of her family members are buried. As she pulls away the weeds and brushes away the leaves, she says (paraphrased) an unattended, unkept grave is a family disgrace. In the city cemetaries, people are paid to mow and sweep - perpetual care is one phrase used. But, in the country graveyards, it is the responsibility of those still alive.
My sister told me the week before Memorial Day used to be a big deal in these small towns. The communities would band together and go the the country cemetaries to clean them up in preparation for the familes coming on Memorial Day but, that tradition has fallen by the wayside. As I stood there, in the company of my brothers, my sister, my son, nieces, nephews, and other family members, as well as my brother's first wife (the mother of his children), I remembered how important family is and how important heritage is.
Take time to reconnect with those members of your family from whom you've drifted away. Family reunions should not only take place at funerals.
posted by OurayDreamer at 10:19 AM
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